Daphne and Etan

So it’s two weeks until the big day and Daphne and I are hunkered down in the Wedding War Room.

Normally, it’s my office/guest bedroom, but with a lot of last minute planning and things to do, I moved Daphne’s computer in here so we could work side by side.

So what exactly goes on in the War Room? Everything from figuring out the seating arrangements to designing a program and printing labels for gift bags for the guests. We just finished making the labels.

OK, I better get back to work or Daphne will beat me! As always, let us know if you have any questions. And I’m happy to report that Daphne let me register for some gadgets and other manly stuff at Sears.

• Read More »

Several wedding guests have contacted us asking if we can put them in touch with other guests who live near them and could drive them to and from the wedding. The majority of our guests are coming from Philadelphia, New York and Boston and are probably driving to the wedding. And since there isn’t a great way to get to Cape May from the Philadelphia or Atlantic City airport without a car, it may make sense to try and carpool with others who may be flying in and renting a car.

Instead of trying to play middle man and connect guests who are looking for rides with those who may have extra room in their car, I decided to set up a very basic forums page which will let our guests connect with one another.

I’ve divided it into two basic forum topics, “Ride Share,” and “Other Wedding Issues.”

So if you are wondering if anyone is driving to the wedding from New York City who has room in their car for you, go to the forums page, click on “Ride Share” and then click on “Newtopic” to create a new topic. In the post you create, you can list your e-mail address or other method for someone to get in contact with you. Or you can just coordinate by posting and replying to other people’s posts.

I set it up so you do not have to register on the forums to post.

Keep in mind that although this website does not get a ton of traffic, you may not want to list your address in a forum post. The forums are merely a starting point and once you find another guest who can help you out, you can coordinate with one another away from the forums. If you create a new post, you can have the message board automatically notify you when someone responds, so you don’t have to keep checking back on the website.

I realize it may have been overkill to set up a message board forum for this purpose, but since I’m into technology and this is the first Web site I’ve really built from the ground up myself, I wanted to give it a try.

• Read More »

Yesterday, we crossed another major thing off of our list — the wedding invitations. The process was a little daunting, and we had some laughs seeing some of the invitations other couples had used.

While flipping through several big books of invitations, both Daphne and I wondered aloud if we were looking at real invitations from real people or if they were just fake ones created by the company. The woman who was helping us assured us they were all real.

The reason we asked is because we found it hard to believe someone would actually send out a wedding invitation that showed a photo of two people with lamp shades on their heads. The other thing that seemed crazy was some of the over the top wording some couples used.

Since we both write for a living, we have a low tolerance for using three words when one will do.

So after we picked out the invitation, the font, and ink color, we went over the wording very carefully, just like we do when we are self editing our stories for the newspaper.

For example, “the favour of your reply is requested on or before…” became “Kindly reply by…”

Less words, gets to the point faster, and doesn’t have that weird spelling of favor.

And we chose a simple, but elegant opening for the invitation: “Together with their families…”

To read the rest, keep an eye on your mailbox in September.

• Read More »

Good news! Daphne found out on Friday that we were quoted the wrong rates for hotel rooms. The prices are a lot more reasonable now.

The true rates start at $100 for a smaller, standard room, $120 for a bigger room with a queen-sized bed, $160 for a room with 2 queen beds, and $170-$180 for suites with bed plus pull-out couch.

There are still about two dozen rooms (caveat — rooms are on the second and third floor and there’s no elevator). The number is 609-884-5868.

When you call, make sure to say you are attending the Sashin-Horowitz wedding.

We’d love for you to join us in staying at the hotel, but if you’d rather stay somewhere else, you can find more information on the hotels page of our site.

• Read More »

After months of deliberating, we finally booked our honeymoon.

Before I tell you where we are going, a little background first.

In the three years Daphne and I have been dating, we haven’t taken any major vacations (a week or more). We generally do short trips to visit family or friends and we did go to Key West for a few days in 2006 for Daphne’s birthday.

Since we knew our honeymoon would be our fist major vacation together, we put a lot of pressure on ourselves. We felt like this trip had to be perfect and include elements of things we’d always wanted to do, such as:

• practice my declining Spanish skills
• relax on the beach
• see culture, perhaps a big European city
• do fun activities, like kayaking or riding on a zip line
• stay in a luxury hotel

But meeting all of these demands and staying within our budget was a challenge. The other thing working against us was vacation time. Since we’re getting married in New Jersey but live in Orlando, we’ve used most of our vacation time flying up north for wedding planning as well as other trips to see family and friends that we usually take.

We considered delaying our honeymoon until early 2009, when we would have more vacation days. And the rainy season would be over in Costa Rica, which was high on our list.

But, the more we thought about it, we decided that we didn’t want to go back to work right after the wedding. Costa Rica would have to wait.

We finally settled on a new all-inclusive resort in Mexico’s Riviera Maya called Secrets Maroma Beach. Like Sandals, Secrets is an adults only all-inclusive chain that’s popular with honeymooners.

The resort is scheduled to open on August 1. We booked through AAA and because the resort is brand new and because it is our honeymooon, we got an amazing deal on one of the nicest suites — it has an oceanview and a jacuzzi on the balcony.

We were a little worried, because the resort was originally supposed to open in July and was pushed back. But we figure November will give them plenty of time to open and even if it wasn’t open in November, Secrets has another resort nearby which is the third most popular hotel in the area on TripAdvisor and is supposed to be very nice.

Secrets Maroma is a five star resort, with 14 pools, six restaurants and it’s on a beach that has been named the best beach in the world several times. It’s about 30 miles from Cancun and not far from the Mayan ruins, so we can take some excursions if we choose.

I’ve been having fun reading through forums on TripAdvisor because a lot of people like us have booked at Secrets Maroma and are looking for information to make sure they will open as planned. Most of the people who post are staying there in August or September, so I imagine they are a little more worried about it not being open on time than we are. I even saw postings from at least two other couples who will also be celebrating their honeymoons at the resort the same week we will be there.

After the wedding we’re flying back to Orlando on Sunday and then flying out Monday morning to Cancun. We fly back the following Sunday. One nice thing is that we got non-stop flights on JetBlue, which is one of our favorite airlines, because of the in-flight TV and the fact that they let you take more than one snack (the animal crackers and blue potato chips are especially good).

Here are a few photos from their web site (which could use a makeover and some more details)

• Read More »

In the second installment of Reports from the Field, here are some thoughts and photos from a wedding we went to in May in Wilmington, Delaware. It was held at the Hotel du Pont.

Rebecca Adler and Andy Warren, May 10, 2008, Wilmington, Delaware

This was the first black tie wedding I have been to and I really enjoyed dressing up and seeing everyone else dressed up. I like that you don’t have to wear a belt with a tuxedo. And the patent leather shoes are pretty snazzy.

There was tons of delicious food at this wedding and the band was great. Late into the night, when the dessert came out, they turned off all the lights because they set the dessert on fire – it was bananas flambe. Daphne also liked how the groomsmen wore calla lilies on their lapels and how there was this cool glass box with the invitation that was set on a table to collect gifts and cards (both pictured below.)

I think we are going to try and find a similar thing to collect envelopes and gifts. When we first started planning our wedding, I said we should get a newspaper box (like the kind you see in the subway), and that everyone could open it up and put their gifts in there. But now I think that idea is kind of tacky.

• Read More »

Since we got engaged in June 2007, Daphne and I have been to two weddings, both of which have been in 2008. We’ve also recently learned that several of our friends and former classmates have also gotten engaged. I’m 26, which I guess is roughly the age that people start getting married.

So since we are planning our wedding, attending other people’s weddings is more than just a chance to have a good time to re-connect with friends. It’s an opportunity to take notes and get ideas on things we may like to incorporate into our own wedding. It also helps us figure out what we don’t want, but of course I’m not going to write about that, because that wouldn’t be very nice, would it?

Here now, are some photos and thoughts from the first wedding we went to this year:

Pamela Gaines and Adam Leenig, January 19, 2008, New York City

This wedding had a very cool, hip, New York feel. It was held on one of the top floors of a warehouse in the warehouse district. Lots of candles, a nice mood.

• Read More »

So in November, Daphne and I took a trip to Cape May to select some vendors. We decided to go on the same weekend that we are getting married so we could see what the weather would be like at that time of year.

Believe it or not, this was actually the first time we saw the Hotel Alcott. Yes, we booked it for our wedding without ever seeing it. But my mom and Daphne’s aunt checked it out and gave it their approval.

It’s not so easy to plan a wedding in New Jersey when you live in Florida. We did take a trip to Cape May to look at venues a while ago, but for some reason, we didn’t know about the Alcott. We had to book it without seeing it because other couples were asking about the date we wanted and there wasn’t time to check it out in person before we needed to commit.

I brought along a little video camera to document the trip. Enjoy!

• Read More »

The lady from the fancy bridal shop in Winter Park called again this week. Luckily, I was not home to answer the phone. She called to say that the store was having a designer showcase that included the dress that “you loved when you were in our store” and the dress would be 10 percent off.

So that would make it…just about $4,000.

The consultant invited me back to the store to try on the dress again. But if I couldn’t make it, not to worry — they could take my deposit over the phone.

Lucky me.

Etan said these consultants are like bill collectors. Very perky bill collectors.

• Read More »

So far I’ve accompanied Daphne to three stores to look for a dress.

The first, was David’s Bridal, and the bad reviews you’ve heard about it are dead on. The carpet was stained, it smelled kind of dingy and it felt like a warehouse. Daphne made an appointment, but we arrived late, so they couldn’t really help us.

The next place we went to was an upscale bridal shop in Winter Park called Solutions Bridal. We knew it was going to be expensive, but decided to go anyway. Daphne’s mom was in town for Thanksgiving, so she came along with us.

The staff was very nice, but they were also somewhat pushy. They don’t let you take pictures of dresses before you put down a deposit, because they know people just go to stores like that to find dresses they like so they can look them up on the Internet and find them cheaper somewhere else. They also give out free champagne and really play up the whole “find the dress of your dreams” thing.

Daphne asked me to take notes on certain dresses, so I had to be sneaky and pretend like I was actually typing e-mails on my BlackBerry instead of jotting down notes on the Romona Keveza that comes with or without wings or the Judd Waddell that is strapless with scalloping.

The woman who helped Daphne seemed shocked that she didn’t want to put down a deposit.

Today, while we were out shopping in Altamonte Springs, we kind of stumbled upon a store for the designer Alfred Angelo.

The store was a nice medium between the stained floors and warehouse feel of DB and the no-pictures-would-you-like-some-champagne vibe of SB.

They let you take all the pictures you want, it’s a laid back atmosphere and they don’t pressure you to put down a deposit. Daphne was also able to walk in without an appointment and try on some dresses.

The saleswoman, who is new and is from Philadelphia, was very nice and even told Daphne to look on the Internet to see if she could find a veil that was cheaper than the ones they sell at the store. Daphne thinks the clerk was so nice because she hasn’t been indoctrinated yet.

There are some interesting interactions that happen in a bridal shop. Like today, Daphne told another bride that she liked the dress the woman was trying on and the woman said she was marrying a minister, so she’d have to cover herself up with something if she chose that dress.

The thing is, at upscale stores such as SB, they are counting on brides to fall in love with a dress and buy it on the spot no matter what it costs. But Daphne and I are pretty sensible, so even though she wants a gorgeous dress, the chances of her finding a dress that she has to buy no matter what it costs are pretty low.

At AA they let us write down all the particulars about the dresses Daphne liked so we can look for them elsewhere or come back later.

Here are some photos of Daphne trying on dresses.

I can’t believe I just wrote a whole post about wedding dresses, but I guess that’s what’s happens when you plan a wedding. I’m involved in the planning as much as I can be and building and updating this Web site is a big part of that.

There is one thing I wonder about when women try on wedding dresses. Is it weird to have a complete stranger in the dressing room with you when you are practically naked? I always hear lots of giggles and chit chat coming from the dressing rooms, but it’s not like the clerks are one of your best friends.

Is buying a wedding dress the only time a woman has a complete stranger helping her in the dressing room or is this a common occurrence? Please enlighten me.

• Read More »